Pearls Before Breakfast
by Morsly
Summary: If everything 16 year old Blair dreamed about actually happened (Yale, Nate, the take down of Jenny Humphrey...), how would Blair and Chuck have ended up together? Lust, lies, and love. You never grow out of the desire to play the game. AU. Chuck/Blair.
1. Chapter 1

AN: With the end of The Fall, I bring you another multi-chapter AU. Enjoy...

P.S. I've stolen the name for this story from a feature written by the Washington Post. That's my disclaimer that the title is not original.

...

Blair Waldorf and Nathaniel Archibald

GOLDEN COUPLE OF MANHATTAN SOCIETY TIES THE KNOT

New York Times June 04, 2014

When Ms Blair Waldorf walked into her kindergarten class on the very first day, she was taken by surprise by the handsome golden haired boy playing with legos. "I didn't know his name, but I already knew we would get married someday," she said.

That day was Friday with a ceremony in the New York Public Library, and a reception at the Plaza Hotel. The guests found the bride and groom both absolutely beautiful, the bride in Dior and the groom in Burberry. They also spoke highly of the eloquent, albeit slightly inappropriate speeches given in tandem by the maid of honor and best man, Serena van der Woodsen and Charles Bass.

Ms Waldorf and Mr Archibald have been together for 9 years, and were extremely ready to get married, even at the young age of 23.

The New York Times wishes the young couple all the best in their many years to come.

...

"Oh my god, B, the New York Times actually, like, wished you luck!"

"Ah!" Blair screamed into the phone. "I know! It's incredible." She sighed, twirling the two rings from Tiffany's on her left ring finger. "It's all incredible."

"And was last night incredible? The first night of your honeymoon aka your wedding night?"

"It was nice! So romantic with rose petals and candles, the works. It helps that we're in Paris. Nothing like the city of light and love to get you in the mood." She smiled.

"Blair, your wedding night shouldn't be just 'nice'," Serena scolded.

"You know we're not the kind of couple that's just into sex. We bond on such a deeper level."

"Yeah, so why aren't you bonding with him right now? I thought we weren't going to talk to me until you got back from your honeymoon."

"He's taking a shower! We're about to go to Laduree and Champs Elysees. Shopping! And you know I couldn't not talk to you for 2 weeks. I miss you already!" Blair put on her pouty face even though she knew Serena couldn't see it.

"I miss you too, B! I have to go meet up with Dan. Have fun dragging Nate into every single store!"

Blair rolled her eyes and ended the call. Nate loved spending time with her. He didn't care if it was in an Elie Saab or Celine boutique.

She took in her surroundings, breathless at the thought that she was here with her _husband_. She was sitting in a chair on the balcony of the luxuriously decorated flat they had rented for their honeymoon. She could see so much of Paris, and the Eiffel Tower was right there. The trees filled the city with beautiful green leaves, and the air smelled of flowers and fresh baked goods. She could see Nate and her retiring here when they got older. All of their 3 children (just like the Kennedy's) having gone off to either Yale or Dartmouth.

Blair snapped out of her fantasy when she heard the shower go off. She stood up and walked to the master suite, excited to see him when he left the bathroom.

Nate came out in all his glory. Tanned skin tight against the toned muscles of his arms, chest and abs. There was a white towel wrapped low on his hips, and his hair was wet and tousled. From her perch on the bed, Blair sighed. She would never get over how beautiful he was.

"Hey, babe." He smiled and went to give her a quick kiss.

"Hey." She said breathlessly.

"I just need to throw some clothes on, and we can go."

"Kay. I think Chuck called you, so you should check your phone."

"Okay, so I'll throw some clothes on while calling Chuck back, and then we can go." He smiled at her, blue eyes gleaming.

Blair got up from the bed. "Only women can multi task, darling. You're probably better off not even trying." She went to kiss his cheek before walking out of the room, hips swaying.

Nate chuckled under his breath at her comment, and picked up his phone to call Chuck.

"Nathaniel! My married man. How are you?"

"Wonderful, thank you. And how are you?"

"Just giddy imagining you and your wife getting it on 24/7. I'm guessing she's let you stop to take a breather since you're talking to me."

"No, actually, we haven't done it since last night. But I really shouldn't be telling you about my sex life with my wife." Nate laughed.

"Of course not. But you really should be taking advantage of what's in front of you, Nathaniel, dear. If you don't, I will."

"I suppose that you threatening to have sex with Blair means you've broken up with Raina?"

"I had to let that one go, yes. She was so high of off the love at your wedding. Chuck Bass rarely does girlfriends, and he will never do a wife."

"You just keep telling that to yourself, Chuck. But I see you settling down eventually."

"Yes, and you also saw Disney Pixar going out of business and Romney winning the election. None of which, thankfully, happened."

"Friend-of-business-my-ass, right?" Nate chuckled.

"Right!"

"Alright, well I've gotta go get back to Blair."

"Planning to tap that ass?"

"No, we're going shopping."

"Really, Nathaniel, do I need to let you borrow my toys?"

"I think we'll be okay, Chuck." Nate laughed. "See you in two weeks."

"Au revoir, mon amour. Que votre journée soit pleine de sexe."

...

Halfway across the world in Manhattan, Serena and Dan were sexing it up, as Nate and Blair probably should have been. Even though it was only 9 AM, Chuck was enjoying a drink. He certainly needed one. There was something off.

Dumping Raina hadn't been that hard. He definitely enjoyed her company, but he didn't see anything long term.

"Since when was Chuck Bass looking for something long term?" He spoke allowed in his penthouse at the Empire. It had been feeling quite empty since Nate had moved into the townhouse he bought with Blair a month before their wedding. A beautiful 5 story brownstone with the front door painted red, and boxes of flowers on the window frames. He was sure Blair would have added a white picket fence if she could.

Was it possible that he was lonely with Nate gone?

Unlikely.

After the wedding, Chuck had felt like a little bit of him had been torn away. Yes, he was sad about Nate leaving, but seeing Blair in her beautiful Dior ball gown had resurfaced the small crush he had on her in high school. The crush that caused him to alienate Nate because of the awful way he treated her. The guy didn't know the good thing he had.

But high school was over, and Blair was married, and they were happy, and so was Chuck.

The scotch in his hand only enhanced his happiness.

That was it.

...

The newly wedded couple came back to their flat exhausted, with good food inside them, and gorgeous clothing in Blair's bags. They settled onto the sofa in the sitting room with Nate reclined, and Blair curled up with her head in his lap. He started stroking her hair.

"Blair?"

"Hm?"

"Do you want to have a baby?"

"Yes. Three. Like the Kennedy's, remember?"

Nate chuckled. "Of course, but I mean, do you want to have a baby now?"

Blair sat up to look him in the eye. "I'm going to law school in the fall, silly. We shouldn't have a baby now."

He took her hand. "But maybe you put off school, so we can start our family."

"I already put off school for one year to plan our wedding." She was looking at him sternly. "My career is what I want to focus on right now."

"Okay. Forget I said anything."

"Why do you want to have a baby now?"

"I just want to make you happy." He smiled at her.

She laid back down on his lap. "Okay..."

"We'll wait until you're ready." He started stroking her hair again, but Blair couldn't help feeling like something was off. She just had to focus on starting law school at Columbia in the fall. After she graduated from Yale, she was immediately accepted, but she deferred a year to get married. With school, her husband and her home, everything would be perfect.

...

Blair woke late in the night. Nate had carried her to their bed and tucked her in whilst she was still clothed. And it felt like it was 90 degrees in the apartment. She quickly got up from the bed and opened a window. The cool breeze of a Parisian night hit her face. The feeling was superb on her damp forehead. She striped down to her La Perlas, and walked to the balcony off the living space. She sat down on one of the cafe chairs and let the wind cool down her feverish body. She pulled her hair off her neck and groaned as the breeze caressed her there.

"This is better than sex." She mumbled, eyes fluttering shut. She stood up quickly when she realized what she had said. Was it possible that standing half naked in the wind was better than sex with her husband?

Of course not. She was just delirious from the heat. That was it.

She crawled back into bed, guilty about what she had said. She looked at Nate. He had fallen asleep in just his underwear, and he was laying on his stomach. Blair started to trace the outline of his spine, and Nate's eyes fluttered open.

"Hey." He smiled, eyes sleepy.

She smiled back and leaned down to kiss him.

He stopped her with a hand on her shoulder. "Mm, Blair, can we not? I'm exhausted."

She nodded and got under the covers, turning away from him, but inside she was screaming. "Why would you not want to?! It's our honeymoon! You should always want me! We're newlyweds!"

Blair felt a single tear fall down her cheek. She was just really really angry. But there would be more time for sex. They were in Paris for two weeks, after all.

And they had the rest of their lives.

Right?

...

AN: Do you like it? If yes, then I'll continue. If no, then I won't. Yes, Chuck and Blair will get together in the end, just trust me. I've got this all planned out... xoxo


	2. Chapter 2

AN: I'm so pleased with the response for this story, so I'm continuing! Just me just clear a few things up: no, Blair and Chuck never hooked up in high school. Chuck had a little crush on her when Nate was treating her badly because of his father and the fact that he liked Serena. No, Nate and Serena never slept together. Serena thought his crush was appalling and is always going to be there for Blair in this story. If I need to clear anything else up, let me know.

...

Blair Waldorf was never one for indulging jetlag. Blair Archibald is no different. The newlyweds got home from JFK at about 5 PM, and by 6, Blair had scheduled brunch for the NJBC in the morning, and sent out invitations for a soiree in a week's time.

That is, she wasn't one for indulging jetlag publically. In the privacy of her own home, there was nothing wrong with making her bath longer than usual and insisting Nate get her dinner all the way from Chinatown. There was nothing like dim sum to get rid of Parisian flight fatigue.

And so she settled into bed, skin soft from her bath oils, with _Sabrina _and pork shumai. The married life was the best life.

Except her husband was nowhere to be found. After dropping off her dinner, Nate had left to get a drink with some college buddies that were in town. Despite Blair's objections and the fact that his family owned a private jet, he left, insisting that he never sees these guys, and he missed them.

"Did he not want to spend his first night home with his wife?" Blair thought to herself as Sabrina returned home from Paris cooking school. Her pork shumai and Audrey films would have to do.

...

Blair walked into the restaurant as the queen of Manhattan in all her glory. Any sign of sleep deprivation (she had waited until 2 for Nate to come home) was seemingly airbrushed off her face. She was gracing the presence of the masses in a black and white striped sleeveless Lanvin dress, sunshine yellow Bottega Veneta heels with bows on the toes, and Oscar de la Renta jewels to match.

"Gingham, Charles? Are you joining the masses in your choice of fashion statements?" Blair spoke as she sat down across from Serena and Chuck.

"Tis the season, Waldorf. And you're just upset that we're matching." He said with a smirk on his face. It was true. The yellow of Blair's shoes and jewelry matched the yellow of his subtle gingham shirt. While she had matched her yellow with just black and white, Chuck had paired his with charcoal pants and suspenders.

Blair rolled her eyes, and turned to Serena, holding out her left hand. Serena grabbed it and squealed. "It's just the one you wanted! He did and a better job with the wedding ring than with the engagement! If that's even possible."

"I know! It's stunning. Wanna see, Chuck?"

"Who do you think told him which one to pick," Chuck rolled his eyes. "Speaking of the man spending his trust fund on making you happy, where is he?"

"He said he would be here in a few minutes. He actually has a job, Chuck."

"I work, Blair, and make quite a lot of money. You on the other hand..."

"Law school!" Blair almost yelled.

Serena giggled. "You two are like an old married couple."

"He's more like my little brother. Immature, vulgar, an ass-"

"Nathaniel!" Chuck stood to greet his friend who was coming in through the door behind Blair."

"Chuck!" Nate replied, turning his friend's handshake into a hug.

"Maybe they should have gotten married," Blair muttered under her breath.

Serena shot her a look as Nate kissed the cheek his wife had offered and sat down next to her.

"So," Nate started. "I'm married now."

"You've been married for 2 weeks, dear." Blair said condescendingly.

"I know, sweetheart," he replied, just as condescendingly. "It just feels so official now that we're all eating lunch together. And I'm married."

"And so am I." Blair smiled.

"And I'm not." Serena made a face.

"Neither am I, sweetheart." Chuck laid his head on Serena's shoulder, mocking the couple in front of him.

Blair rolled her eyes. It was good to be back.

...

Blair picked a piece of lint off her floral brocade Valentino dress. The soft pinks, blues, and greens against the nude fabric would have been too Easter-y for any other occasion, but her almost garish Bijoux Heart earrings and two toned Saint Laurent pumps made the outfit just right for hosting her first ever dinner party as Mrs. Nathaniel Archibald.

She was putting one last coat of lipstick on when she heard a knock at the door. "Come in," she called. "You know, now that we're married, Nate, you really don't-"

"It's me."

Blair turned to look at the intruder. "Oh hey Chuck."

He walked over to her. "I wanted to congratulate you personally." He placed a champagne flute on her vanity.

"Because I got everything I ever wanted?" Blair smiled at her reflection and turned to look at Chuck.

"Here's to an entire life of dinner parties and galas." He raised his glass.

Blair clinked her's with his and stood up to hug him, but something felt off. An entire life of dinner parties and galas? Wasn't she going to be more than that? Law school? Becoming the US ambassador to France, maybe? Blair Waldorf was a lot of things. She wasn't just dinner parties and galas. But maybe Blair Archibald was.

...

The rest of the party went of without a hitch. Everyone laughed and probably drank too much. They were all dressed impeccably, and it was a perfect show of Manhattan society. Even Chuck kept his perverse remarks to a minimum.

Before they knew it, it was midnight, and all of their guests had left.. Blair was clearing plates from the table, when Nate walked in.

"You know we hire people to do that."

Blair smiled at her husband. "I'm just nesting."

"Speaking of nesting..."

Her grip became harder on the plate she was holding. "No." She walked past him and into the kitchen. "I don't want children right now."

"Blair, you've always wanted children." He followed her in.

"I've always wanted a strong career. Young kids and a budding lawyer don't mix."

"Well maybe I don't want you to go to law school."

Blair froze where she was in front of the sink, afraid to turn around. "Why wouldn't you want me to go law school?" Her voice was a barely audible whisper.

"Because I want to get my life started."

She turned around, the blood rising to her face. "Your life is started. You're 23, and your life is way more started than most other 23 year olds! You vowed that your life was with me, and I want to go to law school! That is starting something!"

"Blair-"

"Is this about you wanting to be the breadwinner?"

"Maybe! You just don't have to work!"

"I want to work! Unlike you who reluctantly goes to the office everyday, I want to contribute to society!"

"So contribute by having children with me!"

"I am not a meek housewife who hosts dinner parties for a living! I'm going to get my career started!"

And with that, she stormed past him, grabbing her keys and slamming the front door behind her. She hailed a cab immediately and climbed in. Her heart was pounding and her head was filled with rage. This wasn't the 15th century. Just because they were married didn't mean he had the right to dictate her entire life.

She almost didn't hear the cab driver ask her where to. "West 63rd Street, The Empire Hotel."

She was almost surprised to hear herself say that, but somewhere in her angry subconscious, some deductive reasoning had been going on. Serena had gone straight to Dan's after the party, so neither her apartment or Brooklyn were options. Chuck's was the only place she could go.

...

When he had gotten home, he headed straight for his minibar. The weak-ass alcohol they had served did little to help his troubled mind. The mind that was troubled because she blatantly accepted that she would be little more than a housewife for the rest of her life, because her Valentino was dangerously tight across her chest, and because her features looked so soft in the dimmed light of their dining room.

He poured himself a glass of the strongest stuff you can drink and sat down on the couch. He must have finished it all and fallen asleep because he was woken up by her Saint Laurents clicking across his floor. When he opened his eyes, she was standing in front of him. She wasn't crying, but her jaw was clenched, and her hand knuckles were white on the strap of her handbag.

"Can I help you?" He sat up, wiping the sleep from his face.

"It's Nate," she sat down next to him, back rod straight.

"I surmised." He sat up, putting the empty glass at his side on the table. "Do you want to talk about it."

She shook her head a little bit. "Not now."

Chuck nodded.

"Do you want to eat something?" Her voice was quiet.

"Was the salmon not to your liking, Waldorf?"

"I don't like eating in front of him."

"You're married..."

"I don't want to talk. Let's just eat."

"Should I just order up anything?"

She nodded her head. Chuck got up to make the call. When he came back to sit with her, she was still sitting up straight, ankles crossed.

"Blair,"

"I said no talking."

He ignored her. "You've been in Valentino for the past 6 hours. Would you like to borrow something to change into?"

The words sounded awkward coming out of his mouth, but she knew he was just being courteous. She nodded again.

He stood up and walked into his bedroom. She followed. He went to the bottom drawer in his dresser and pulled out a pair of navy blue silk pajamas. They had his initials monogrammed on the right breast.

"Can you...?" Blair motioned to her back.

"Sure." He walked behind her and put a hand on her shoulder, steadying her. He pulled the zipper down the back of her dress in one smooth motion. She didn't move away from his touch, comforted by his warm breath fanning out on the back of her neck.

He was mesmerised by the soft cream of her skin and how it contrasted with the small strip of black fabric that was the back of her bra. But this was wrong. You aren't supposed to be mesmerized by your best friend's wife's skin. _Wife._

He cleared his throat and took his hand off her shoulder. "I'll let you change."

She nodded, and he walked out of the room, closing the door behind him.

Was it possible that his breath on the back of her neck made her feel more than her husband's hands on her body?

Of course not.

She quickly took her dress off and pulled on his pajamas, noting that they smelled not like cologne most men wear, but just like Chuck.

She walked out of his room to see that he had laid the food brought up on the coffee table. She walked over and sat down, noting what he had ordered: scrambled eggs, fresh fruit, croissants, and bacon. Breakfast. She raised an eyebrow at him.

"It's the most important meal of the day." He shrugged.

She picked up a plate and started scooping up the berries and eggs. When she had finished, Chuck took the plate from her hands.

"Chuck! What are you doing?"

He put a croissant and two pieces of bacon on her plate. "Eat it. You're about the size of my pinky finger."

"Trust me, it's on purpose." She glared at him, but ate the food anyway. When she was a good portion of the way through her plate, he finally spoke.

"Do you want to tell me what happened?"

"He doesn't want me to go to law school."

"Right. He told me that."

"What did you say?"

"That you need to go."

"I deserve it!"

"I agree. You've worked hard, and you'll be fabulous at it."

"And did he tell you why he didn't want me to go?"

"Enlighten me."

"Because he wants us to start having children. Now."

"You're 23."

"I'm aware!"

"So you got into a really big fight over it?"

"I'm passionate." She shrugged.

"Galas and dinner parties are not your entire future, Blair."

She smiled at him. "You're right."

...

When they were finished eating and talking, Chuck turned on a movie. It was something neither of them watched, as they fell asleep almost immediately. Blair curled up at Chuck's side, her head resting on his shoulder and his arm around her. They stayed like that for the rest of the night.

...

AN: Have you noticed that Chuck still calls Blair 'Waldorf' even though she's now an Archibald? Also that Chuck is the one that picked out the wedding band she loves so dearly? Just some things to think about...


	3. Chapter 3

AN: I'm really sorry that I'm not updating Picture Perfect, but I'm not feeling the kind of inspiration for fluff. I'm feeling the inspiration for exploration and angst and darkness and the beauty that is CB. This has been brought on by my retelling of the second half of s5 to my friend. I told her to skip it, save the last 3 episodes, and it got me feeling those primitive Chair feels. I then decided it would be a good idea to watch the best CB video in the entire world, a beautiful editing job set to Poison and Wine. I cry everytime I watch it. It's so beautiful and dark. My little bit of sorrow at their not-so-perfect journey to where they are in PP might become apparent in this chapter. But you know what, I hope it does. I'm really sorry for this rambling, but I just love Chuck and Blair so much it consumes me.

...

She awoke to a man's scent that did not belong to her husband. Nate's usually assaulted her in the morning. Harsh body wash and the dark cologne that would rub off on the undershirt he would wear to bed every night.

But this scent did not attack her. It was warm. It enveloped her in a soft embrace she had not yet experienced too often. She nuzzled into the rumpled oxford shirt that carried the scent, trying to take in as much of it as possible. But she realized that it didn't come from his clothes, but from his skin. And that it wasn't any commercial scent that could be bought at Bendel's, but a scent original to it's owner. It was intoxicating.

She felt a hand stroke her back. His touch through the silk on her skin sent shivers down her spine.

"Blair," he whispered.

Her eyes fluttered open, and she realized she was laying directly on him, their fronts pressed together. Nate never liked to lay like that. It hurt his hips. But the warmth of another body pressed up against hers felt superb.

She saw that he was looking up at the ceiling, one hand behind his head, and the other laying in the small of her back. He had a five o'clock shadow, and his cheeks were more hollow than usual. He had dark circles under his eyes.

Blair flushed red when the reality of what she was doing hit her. He was looking at her then. She gave him a sheepish smile, and tried to slither down him to get up. It didn't exactly work the way she had planned. Her shirt had ridden up by the time her torso met his groin, and she could feel his heat through his dress pants on her abs. She flushed an even deeper red and stood up immediately.

She felt herself go lightheaded at the sudden movement, and she swayed on her feet. Chuck sat up and grabbed her hands, steadying her.

"Was he always this beautiful?" Blair thought to herself, her mind still full of sleep. Despite the obvious lack of sleep and food he was getting, the freshly awoken Chuck looked incredibly handsome. His hair was rumpled out of place, and his shirt was unbuttoned at the top two buttons, revealing dark chest hair. It was so manly compared to Nate's professionally waxed chest.

"Are you okay?" His voice was thick with sleep, adding to his obvious sexiness.

Blair flushed red again. "Yeah, I just need to leave. Sorry if I imposed." She pulled her hands out of his and moved to go pick up her purse and clothes.

"You didn't impose. Are you going home?" He stood up and ran a hands through his hair. He picked a couple dishes off the coffee table and walked to the kitchen.

"Nate should be at work." She followed him in. "Do you think you can call down for a cab?" I don't really want to be seen around Manhattan in just Saint Laurents and your pajamas."

"Are you taking them with you?" He smirked as he laid the dishes in the sink.

She went red again. "Do you want them back?"

"No, give them back another time." He smiled at her and went to pick up the phone to give orders to the concierge. When he had hung up the phone, he walked Blair to the elevator, one hand on her back.

"I really appreciate you letting me stay the night."

"It's no problem, Blair. You've nursed me out of many drunken states in the middle of the night. I owed you."

She smiled at his words and offered a cheek to be kissed. When he obliged, she could swear she felt a burning in the best way where their flesh touched.

The elevator dinged, and she stepped inside. "Goodbye, Bass."

"Goodbye, Waldorf."

...

When Blair closed the door of the cab, she finally relaxed. She had no idea what it was, but that was the most restful sleep she'd had in months. She was high strung in Paris and high strung before her wedding and high strung during her engagement. For some strange reason, sleeping on the bright red couch in Chuck's penthouse was the thing that finally unwound all her many springs. She pulled out her phone to text Serena.

**Meet me at the brownstone in an hour. Bring Starbucks, Laduree and your Kate Hudson movie collection.**

She got a reply almost immediately.

**I thought you got your period in the beginning of the month. It's the end of June.**

Blair rolled her eyes and typed back.

**A double shot in my sugar free mocha.**

Did Serena not understand that she was having a crisis?! Not only was her husband being a total ass, but she got butterflies from Chuck! The only thing she'd ever gotten from Chuck before had been witty banter and more responsibility when he drank too much! This was not okay, this 'caring Chuck'. It needed to end.

...

When Serena arrived 10 minutes after she was supposed to, Blair had showered and changed into a pair of leggings and her coveted silk Anna Sui tunic. After taking off the pajamas, she had planned to throw them in the hamper to be washed, but to be expected, the tag red 'dry clean only'. More like 'Chuck Bass is the only one would have dry clean pajamas."

Blair opened the door for her best friend. "Finally. I could have died by now!"

"Well it's hard to be prompt when I'm acting as your golden retriever." Serena handed the tray of coffee to Blair and walked inside.

"But you're so good at it!" Blair closed the door behind her. They walked up the stairs to the master bedroom. Blair thought having a TV anywhere else was tacky. Only when they had settled all of Serena's goodies did she finally speak again.

"So what's your crisis?"

"No talking yet. How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days, first."

Serena rolled her eyes and took the DVD from her bag. This would probably be a very long day.

...

When the credits had finally stopped rolling, Serena turned to her friend and laced their fingers together. "Can you please tell me what's wrong?"

"Nate doesn't want me to go to Columbia."

"That's crazy! You're meant to be in the courtroom."

Blair smiled. "I know! He wants us to start a family."

"You guys are 23! Plus I already have to share you with Nate, I don't want to have to share you with a baby too."

Blair giggled. Serena always knew how to make her feel better. "I don't want to have to chose between you and a baby either, S. I just don't want children this young. He knows that! He's always known my life plan! I don't get what the rush is."

"Just tell him that. He loves you and he married you. He has to understand."

"I agree."

"Was that all?"

Blair sighed. "No." She turned her head away from Serena.

"Blair," she have her a look. "What is it?"

"I was so upset last night, that I left the house. I went to Chuck's."

"Oh my god! Did you do anything?" Serena sounded appalled.

"No! Of course not!"

Serena let out a breath of relief.

"But he lent me pajamas and ordered me food and put in a move and we cuddled and fell asleep."

"You and I do that, Blair. Why are you freaking out about it?"

Blair rolled her eyes. "Because he smells amazing and looks amazing and acted amazing and he wears pajama sets, for Christ's sake!"

"Do you have a crush on Chuck?!"

"No! I swear! He just challenges me intellectually, and I know that Nate would never do what Chuck did last night. I feel self conscious even eating in front of Nate, S."

"Do you regret marrying him?"

"I love him."

"But do you regret marrying him?"

"No." But her voice sounded a little bit unsure.

...

Nate got home an hour after Blair had expected him to. Having already eaten dinner, she was sitting in their formal reception room with a cup of green tea. Her legs were curled up under her, and there was not a spot of makeup on her face.

He stood in the doorway to the room, briefcase in one hand and red roses in the other. He never got the flowers right. He also must have let them out in the late June Manhattan heat too long because they were wilted. Blair tried to be pleased with the gesture, but she could hardly find comfort in it.

"I'm sorry." His voice was small.

"I know. I'm sorry too."

He nodded and continued to stand in the doorway.

"Nate?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm ready to have a baby."

He dropped his briefcase and the flowers to run to her. There was a smile ear to ear on his face. She stood up to hug him and managed a smile that didn't quite meet her eyes.

He pulled away and kissed her on the mouth. It felt a little bit like being kissed by a dog. He pulled away again. "Do you want to try now?"

Blair laughed, the sound hollow in her chest. "Sure!"

He took her hand to lead her up the stairs to their bedroom. They got onto the bed. He awkwardly tried to get her leggings off as she smoothly pulled down his pants. He smiled at her before entering, kissing her neck sloppily as he did.

There was nothing romantic about their so called 'love-making'. He didn't even want her naked first. It felt like a chore.

When they were done, Nate went downstairs to get himself dinner. Blair laid in their bed and just cried.

...

On the Upper West Side, Chuck was shit faced drunk. As soon as Blair had left, he called his secretary to let her know that he'd be taking a personal day. A personal day for Chuck just included a lot of drinking. A lot of drinking. There was no way he could feel what he was feeling without the veil of alcohol surrounding his mind.

Nate didn't want Blair to go to law school. Because he wanted to start a family. Because he was a selfish asshole.

And Blair had been at Chuck's side all night. Sleeping in his clothes. He didn't want her to wash them, anything to try to preserve her scent.

She still wore Miss Dior, just more proof that she was still too young to be a mother. But that wasn't all that she smelled like. There was jasmine and musk and citrus mixed in with her Miss Dior. A smell that was all her own. A scent that was Blair Waldorf.

He had to binge drink just to try and forget it.

To forget everything.

His best friend's girlfriend?

His best friend's _wife_.

That was fundamentally fucked. But what about Chuck Bass isn't?

...

AN: Dark enough for you? Gosh, that felt good. I love angst. Fun fact: Forbes does a Fictional 15 where they find the 15 richest fictional characters. Chuck Bass was on the list in '10. Adorable. Also, they do fictional interviews. There is one for both Blair and Chuck. They are both just 'eh' and emulate the stereotypes of the characters, but it's pretty funny to read. Forbes is a secret Chair shipper. Adorable.

P.S. Have any of you noticed a lack of updates from super awesome stories? Maryl is the only one updating. I hope everyone didn't die...


	4. Chapter 4

AN: This chapter took a whole lot of hard work and help (thank you a billion times, nlizzette7). I now bequeath you with a long-ass chapter (for me, anyway), and a good reason to change the rating to M...

...

Her nightly bath was always Blair's place for reflection. The lavender scented water and vanilla scented candles around her truly cleared her head. As she descended into the almost too hot water, the inner monologue began...

The sex with her husband wasn't bad. It wasn't awful or plain or mediocre. But wasn't 'we just got married and I'm so in love with you' sex. It wasn't 'I forever want to be a part of you' sex. It most certainly wasn't 'I love you so much that I don't care if I break this glass table' sex. It was 'trying to have a baby' sex. It was the type of sex that's scheduled. The kind that doesn't require anyone to be fully naked. To kiss every inch of your lover. To actually care about pleasure. So Blair did still have orgasms, but they weren't newlywed orgasms. Not the kind she was supposed to be having.

It was just a testament to her selflessness that she was putting off law school to create a new Archibald. Nate didn't want the same big white wedding that Blair did, but she got it anyway. She felt she owed it to him. And 18+ years of raising children in equal in worth to a big white wedding, right?

There was also the Chuck factor. The simple fact of the matter is when you have a child with someone, you are tied to them for life. If Blair had Nate's child, then there would be no more room for feelings for anyone other than her husband. Right?

Babies are magical, and the law will wait.

Right?

All the doubts running through her head had caused the water around her to go cold, and she shivered at once. She picked herself out of the water, goose bumps erupting all over her skin. She quickly reached for a towel, but the wrack was empty. Nate was supposed to put fresh towels on it every other day. Blair sighed and wrapped her arms around her naked body, stepping out of the bath and towards the linen closet to find a towel.

Regardless of her doubts, there was another problem staring her right in the face. How would she tell Serena and Chuck that their pep talks hadn't worked at all?

...

"You did what?!" Even over the phone, Serena's voice sounded full of disappointment.

"I knew you would react like this." Blair rolled her eyes as a dainty Korean lady painted her toenails red in the private room she had requested.

"I can't believe you let him talk you into this."

"He didn't. I decided on my own 3 weeks ago."

"You've had this decision made for 3 weeks?!"

"I didn't tell you because I knew you would freak out!" Blair picked a piece of lint off of her dress, both annoyed and nervous at Serena's reaction. What happened to unconditional support?

"Well my freaking out is justified."

"No it's not. I always wanted children. I'm just going to get them sooner than expected."

"Blair, everyone wants you to go to law school. You want to go to law school."

"Hillary Clinton had Chelsea and then had a huge career. I can do it too."

"But what if you don't? What if he never lets you go because he's controlling you wil puppy dog eyes and his six pack?!"

"He doesn't have that sort of control over me. We need to make decisions together now that we're married." Blair said matter-of-factly.

"You guys have practically been married since kindergarden. You made the decision to go to law school with him, and he can't just back out on it. It's not fair to you."

"This is my choice, Serena. I need to do what's best for my marriage. And right now, that's putting off my career and trying to have a baby."

"You shouldn't have to worry about the state of your marriage 1 and 1/2 months in!"

"I need to go." Serena was right, though. The first year of marriage is supposed to be devoid of compromise. Everything should should run smoothly. It simply wasn't for Blair and Nate.

"Are you having scheduled sex?! This is not what you wanted! You always talked about having a baby out of love after you get your career started!"

"I just need to go." Serena was right.

"Bye."

"I love you."

"I love you too. That's why I want you to go to Columbia in the fall."

"Bye." She was so right.

"Bye."

...

She walked into the shabby diner he asked her to meet him at with a scowl on her face. This place was gross and full of middle age commuting businessman. She saw Chuck at the back of the restaurant and walked to meet him.

"You know, Chuck, Oscar and Christian don't really go well with shabby Greek diners."

He stood to greet her. "We're still on the Upper East Side, Blair."

"Just barely." She sat down with him.

"You look like you've been doing anything but sleeping at night." He smirked. But he was one to talk. His had dark circles under his eyes, and he seemed paler than usual, given that it was August. He was obviously troubled by something.

"I'd appreciate it if you didn't criticize my appearance in the first minute of our meeting." She rolled her eyes. It was just like Chuck to get her off her game by bringing her to out-of-her-element diners and make jabs at the discoloration under her eyes.

"It's not an insult." He unwrapped the silverware on the table and put the napkin in his lap. "I'm glad that you and Nate are enjoying yourselves." He tried to smile at her, but it didn't quite meet his eyes.

"Good. Because we are" she said defensively. There was just something about his countenance that made her feel like she had to be defensive.

"Good." He smirked at her, obviously pleased that he was getting under her skin.

"Can I take your order?" An eastern european waitress came to their table. Blair hadn't even looked at the menu.

"A bowl of chicken and rice soup, please." Chuck gave the waistress a smoldering smile as he handed her the menu, brushing hands with her.

Blair rolled her eyes at his obvious flirtation. "A small greek salad, dressing on the side." She brought the attention back to herself. Chuck was not the superior of the two of them.

"A small salad?" He frowned.

"It's none of your business." She glared at him as the waitress walked away. "I can eat whatever I want."

"Except you look like you're wasting away. I'm worried about you." He sounded so sincere, all teasing gone.

"Please, Chuck, don't be." She hung her head a little. Genuine Chuck always made a small blush creep to her cheeks.

"Okay." He shrugged leaning back in his chair.

"I have some news." She smiled, trying to change the subject.

"Good news?"

"For me." She smiled again, trying to get it to reach her eyes.

"Okay." He crossed his arms over his chest.

"I'm putting off law school." She dropped eye contact, smile still there.

"For Nate, then? So you can have a baby?" He sat back up, anger in his voice.

"Yes." Her voice got smaller.

"That's horrible news."

"Hillary Clin-"

"You're Blair Waldorf. The Clintons had nannies and Chelsea was the most low maintenance teenager ever."

"I can do it." Her voice was starting to rise.

"Do you want my opinion?"

"You've already given it."

"Can I articulate it?"

"Fine." She was the one leaning back with her arms crossed.

"You're letting him control you. Just because you succumed to the sin that is marriage doesn't mean you have to succum to the 17th century definition of it. You're Blair Waldorf. You should be telling him 'no'. You do have that power." There was more than just his usual 'I'm right and you're wrong' look on his face. He looked sympathetic and his eyes had something resembling love in them.

"Marriage is about partnership." She was melting under that look. Forming an argument is not easy when the smoldering eyes of Chuck Bass are on you. She felt a brick forming in her stomach.

"You're not acting as partners." His voice was soft and soothing.

"I need to go." She picked up her bad and quickly made her exit. There was only so much truth she could hear in one day.

...

She was sitting up in bed rereading The Age of Innocence, but she could hardly pay attention to Wharton's words, as a certain Bass's and van der Woodsen's kept playing over and over in her head. She spoke to her husband in bed beside her. "Serena and Chuck want me to go to Columbia next month."

He put down his Sports Illustrated to look Blair in the eye. "I thought we agreed."

"We did," she shrugged. "That's just their opinion." She closed her book, preparing for what might be a long conversation.

"Well they don't really get to have an opinion." Nate's voice was firmer than usual. In the past month of their scheduled love making, he'd only spoken soft and subtle words.

"They're our best friends. Chuck is the reason you know how to party, and Serena is my lifeline. They're family." Blair offered a smile, not wanting to get into a fight.

"I thought we were family Blair."

"We are, and a baby will make it official." The smile she plastered on her face was beginning to feel fake.

"I agree. I love you." He leaned in to give her a soft kiss. When he pulled back, he heaved a sigh and looked down at his lap.

"I love you too. Are you okay?" She looked at him questioningly. He looked guilty.

"I just need to get something off my chest." He was still looking down.

"Nate... What is it?" She sounded worried now.

"I know you'll be angry, but remember how much I love you." Still no eye contact.

"You're scaring me." She managed a laugh.

"I had sex with someone else." There was a pause as the information sunk into them both.

"What?! When?!" All humor was gone from Blair's disposition. She felt her face heat up and tears prick her eyes.

"Before we got engaged." He finally looked up, eyes large and round.

"When?" Her voice was a barely audible whisper.

"The day I bought your ring."

She rolled her eyes at his answer as a tear slid down her cheek. "Before or after?"

"Before."

"Who was it?"

"I didn't know her." His voice was soft, as if preparing for any punishment he deserved.

"Do you now?" More tears were falling now.

"No."

"Why did you do it?"

"I was scared." He looked away again.

"Of me?" She cried out.

"Of spending the rest of my life with you. Our lives are so long, Blair. I wasn't sure yet. I'm so sorry." He turned back and took her hand, but she pulled it away, a look of disgust on her face.

"So you cheated on me to make sure you loved me?!"

"I know how bad it sounds."

"You mean how bad it is. Why didn't you tell me sooner?" She started to get out of bed. Blair Waldorf never argues sitting down.

"I still wasn't sure."

"About us?! Nate, we're married. How can you not be sure?!"

"I don't know! That's why I want to have a baby." His voice was rising.

"You cheated on me, married me, and want to impregnate me just to make sure you love me?! She was practically yelling now. This was all too much.

"Of course I love you, Blair!" He only sounded half sure.

"Then why did you cheat on me, and why are you questioning our relationship now?!"

"I don't know." He was quiet again.

"I can't believe this." Blair put her hands to her face, wiping the tears and cooling her hot skin.

"You're the only thing I've ever known!"

"You chose to stay with me because it's safe?! Do you even love me like you used to? Do you love me the same?!" A sob escaped her chest.

"All I know is that I love you, and I want to have a baby with you now!" He looked at her solemnly, blue eyes shining.

"I don't believe you want to have a baby because you love me. It's because you're scared we won't work out."

"Blair..."

"Are you not going to deny it?!"

"No."

"Oh my god! My entire marriage is a freud!" She moved to pick up her purse off of the floor by her vanity.

"We can work this out."

She was standing at their bedroom door now. There was no way she could stay here, looking at him and sleeping in the same bed. All of his promises and vows had been a lie. He had no idea what he wanted, and Blair didn't want to stick around to see if it was actually her. "I don't want to."

...

He was leaning on the pool table with a glass of something toxic in his hand. He was still in his daily business formal, but his face was strained. It looked like he was in pain. He heard the elevator 'ding' and straightened up. Blair walked into the atrium wearing only a pink cotton pajama set and a Marc Jacobs crossbody bag. There was not a spot of makeup on her face, and her eyes were red from crying.

"Blair." He stayed where he was, obviously a little drunk and obviously not very sympathetic to whatever was troubling her. Until she stood up for herself, he wouldn't be.

"Can I come in?" Her voice shook.

"What is it now? He wants to move to the suburbs? You'll cry about it and then give in. No matter what you say, I will not visit in you in Westchester."

"Nate cheated on me. He's not sure about us." A sob escaped her chest, triggered by both her obvious predicament and his harsh words.

He seemed to automatically sober up, the grip on his glass becoming harder and his face softening. "What can I do?" He clenched his jaw.

"Let me stay the night?" She offered.

He nodded. "Do you want a drink?"

"Yeah," she sighed, walking over to him and dropping her purse on the couch on the way there. He poured her a scotch and handed it to her. Their hands touched, and Blair felt warmth and comfort in the softness of his large hand. She took the glass and brought it to her lips. The drink burned all the way down her throat, but she felt a heat spread across her chest that thawed the sharp pain that had taken up residence there.

"You can sleep in my bed tonight. I'll take the couch." He wouldn't look at her, afraid of what he would see there.

"No," her voice was urgent. "I don't want to be alone."

He nodded and put his glass on the the pool table. "I need to shower. Make yourself at home."

She watched him walk away, then, his strong gait seemingly broken.

...

When he got out of the bathroom, Blair was curled up in his bed, back facing the bathroom door. He climbed in, making sure to stay as far away from her small body as possible. He didn't think he could trust himself to not make a move. Just because Nate cheated didn't mean she wanted to leave him. And that scent of hers...

When Blair said she didn't want to be alone, she also meant it physically. As soon as she felt the bed shift, she turned to look at him. His back was to her at the far end of his king sized bed. She slowly scooted towards him, pressing her front against his back and wrapping a thin arm around his torso. She felt his body tense up, and he turned to look at her.

"Blair..."

"Please, Chuck. I don't want to be alone."

"This doesn't feel right. I can't do this to Nate or your relationship. No."

Blair pulled her hand off of him, and scooted back on the bed. "I'm leaving him, Chuck. He cheated on me because he wasn't sure he wanted to be with me, and then he married me and no he wants to have a baby and he's still not sure!" She sat up. "I'm done with the indecisiveness! He didn't know when we were in high school and he doesn't know now. He married me because it was safe. I'm so done."

Chuck was sitting up at this point as well. He sat back against the headboard and pulled her into her arms. They stayed like that until she had stopped crying. When he felt the sobs no longer coming from her chest, he reached a hand down to her chin to pull her face to his. He placed a light kiss on her lips, and it had the same effect as the scotch. His lips burned hers, and a warmth spread through her chest all the way to her toes.

She reached up to put her hand on the back on his neck, increasing the pressure on each other's lips. He slowly opened her mouth with the tip of his tongue, dancing along the edge until she started to play along. He put an arm around her waist and lowered her body to the bed. They were kissing with ferocity now. It was a feeling Blair hadn't experienced in a long time, this passion.

She started at the buttons of his shirt, putting her hands in between their bodies. She felt him tense up, and he pulled away. "Are you sure?"

She didn't say anything. She let go of his shirt to pull his head back down to hers, her lips more eager this time. She was so sure. Blair continued to unbutton his shirt with a quickening pace. Chuck pulled away again, putting a hand on the busy one of hers. "Take your time," he whispered in her ear, helping her to finish pulling his shirt off.

He started to kiss her jawline and down her neck to her chest where he proceeded to unbutton her shirt, leaving a kiss where every button had been. She played with his hair, then. Small circling motions that soothed the both of them. He stopped the kisses where her pants started and moved back up to kiss her. Blair groaned at his teasing. As he kissed her, he moved a hand to a breast under her shirt. She started to squirm under his touch. He broke off the kiss to move his mouth elsewhere, latching onto a dark bud.

"God," Blair moaned, grabbing the hair at the nape of his neck. He was her anchor. He lifted his head away from her skin and Blair whimpered. He quickly kissed the pout on her lips before beginning to run his mouth down her stomach again. This time his tongue drew patterns on her firm porcelain belly. He stopped at her pant's seam, fingering the fabric there. He kissed her skin once more before starting to pull off her pants. Blair lifted her hips to help him, the anticipation killing her.

He moved his mouth back up to hers, but kept a hand on her torso, trailing to down to her mound. He stuck a finger in between her outer lips. "Fuck, Blair," he spoke into her mouth. She was really squirming under his touch now. He stuck a finger inside her, pleased with how soft and tight she was. He stuck another in and put his thumb on her clit.

She broke off their kiss to cry out. "Chuck, please!" She reached for his pants to pull them off, but her arms would only go so far down. He did as she wanted, and in a split second he was on her, his heat pressed up against her inner thigh. Instead of making that one move, he leaned his mouth to her ear to ask two questions.

The formality of "Do we need a condom?" To that, she shook her head.

And then the oddly romantic "Are you sure?" She lifted her hips towards his in reply.

He looked into her eyes before proceeding. They were so clear. She stroked his jaw with a feather light touch. In the pits of their stomachs, they both felt something beginning to grow. Lust, maybe. But maybe not. Time would tell.

He thrust into her, relishing the way her body contracted beneath him. He continued the motion until they both were unraveling. It was like a fire was roaring through them, exploding through their bodies all at once, and when they were done, the sparks didn't go away.

He placed small kissed on her body as he got off from on top of her. She cuddled into him at once, and for the first time ever, Chuck allowed it, wrapping his arms around her and burying his face in her hair. She smelled of perspiration, that signature scent, and rebellion. The full weight off what they had just done crashed onto him, but it only made him want to hold on to her tighter.

As if this was how it was supposed to be all along.

...

AN: What do you think?


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